Life's greatest teachers are heart-breaks, emptiness and failures.
We come across things in our lives that - at the time - can become obstacles. Sometimes we take one over another, and sometimes they come all at once. I have noticed recently that I have fallen into a slump. I take these "obstacles" and pile them up. I even take an obstacle and twist it to make it seem worse than it actually is. In my head, it is that bad.
I've recently had a few events happen that felt like my heart was breaking and have created this slump. Does that happen to anyone else? Something you care about so much doesn't pan out in your favour and it ends up hurting so badly?
Heartbreaks
Everyone knows what rejection feels like. It’s a universal (and universally disliked) experience, but it’s one that we each experience differently. For the most part, people are pretty good at moving on with their lives — even better than they might guess. Sometimes, though, getting rejected hurts more than we expect, especially if our immediate response is to become self-critical.
I have tried to enter into a position where I thought I'd fit perfectly, only to receive an email ten days later saying that I am no longer in consideration. In my mind, I had this whole thing planned out, and I've been thinking about it for some time, only to have someone who doesn't know me tell me that it's not going to happen. This has been the third time.
Maybe one day you will pour all you have into something you care about so much, and it will spill it all out on the floor. It's kind of like you spend so long preparing a nice cup of tea for someone, only for them to turn around and tell you that they do not like tea (and who doesn't like tea.. well, you get my point?)
If you didn't learn anything from a situation, chances are that situation will happen again at some point in your life. The funny thing is, I wasn't expecting to have to relive these heartbreaks so often and not in different aspects in my life. In my career, in my hobbies, in my relationships and in general - my future.
Fortunately, life does not come out with an exact blueprint on how each day, and each step are meant to be. We do not come with a manual. Our life is individual to ourselves, and we do not have to succumb to what others dictate. Not always, and this is where I slipped off to the next stage. Emptiness.
Emptiness
Then that initial sting turns into emptiness. You lose your focus, your drive. You have lost your purpose and maybe even your sense of awareness. When you lose these things, a void fills your heart and your mind. It may be confusing, but it happens to everyone.
Be picky with who and what you invest your time in. Wasted time is worse than wasted money. Every moment you spend wishing for an alternate outcome, you lose the chance to enter into new opportunities, one that may be more fruitful than the original plan.
I've learned this ever since I was younger. When something happens that effects your current standing, something even better is waiting for you. I used to be very active in the sports back in my hometown. I've played multiple sports for many years, but my sports 'career' ended with two concussions in the same weekend. I was pulled from sports immediately. But something else swooped in and changed everything - theatre. I have never been so drawn to a hobby in my whole life, and to the point that I wished for it to be my career (and still have thoughts about it to this day). I have had so many new opportunities branch from that, from community theatre to new friendships, and even spreading my wings with writing.
Everything happens for a reason. That emptiness you feel will lessen overtime. You will still hold a spot for that void in your heart, but something bigger and better will come along and ease that pain. I still think about sports often, but I do not know where I would be now without theatre in my life.
Failures
Over time, the things that bring us from heartbreaks to emptiness can be seen as failures. I am here to question the word, 'failure'. My biggest fear is failing, or the feeling of failing myself or others. I strongly dislike disappointment. So this is my mental chatter that I face now, in a way to control that anxiety.
Everything we go through is what creates us. The good and the bad. We shouldn't try to stop everything from happening. Sometimes we are meant to feel awkward, or vulnerable. Sometimes it's necessary because it's all part of getting to the next part of yourself. Who knows, that next part may be your best self.
After all, it is better to do something that others criticize than to do nothing and criticize others, and you cannot change what you refuse to confront. If I didn't try the things that I have this past year or two, I wouldn't have had these new changes happen that have blest me with new growth and new appreciation for different things. I have a whole new view on what is out there for me.
Just consider this. Consider becoming the type of energy that no matter where you go, or where you are, you always add value to the spaces and lives of those around you. So every attempt that you try, continues to add more value, maybe even more knowledge for yourself and for others. It is all a learning curve, all a new environment. Test the waters.
Remember, Things take time, and if you don't have the patience to let things slow cook and form then expect a life continually unfulfilled. We can't have high expectations and low patience.
If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives.
I suppose that I worry that each opportunity runs on time. Time is typically the most important variable in the equation of life. How much time to do I have? Will there be enough time? When?
Life is short, too short. Yes, that is the time variable speaking. But in the life we do have, we have an infinite amount of opportunities that await us. We only need to take the first step at opening the doors.
Yes, I have been good about opening those doors. Yes, I take rejection hard. No, I will not stop opening the doors. I do not want to waste the life I have. Even if I am rejected a dozen more times, more discoveries will unfold and more chances at new beginnings will be had. I learn and adapt. I become a better me.
We come across things in our lives that - at the time - can become obstacles. Sometimes we take one over another, and sometimes they come all at once. I have noticed recently that I have fallen into a slump. I take these "obstacles" and pile them up. I even take an obstacle and twist it to make it seem worse than it actually is. In my head, it is that bad.
I've recently had a few events happen that felt like my heart was breaking and have created this slump. Does that happen to anyone else? Something you care about so much doesn't pan out in your favour and it ends up hurting so badly?
Heartbreaks
Everyone knows what rejection feels like. It’s a universal (and universally disliked) experience, but it’s one that we each experience differently. For the most part, people are pretty good at moving on with their lives — even better than they might guess. Sometimes, though, getting rejected hurts more than we expect, especially if our immediate response is to become self-critical.
I have tried to enter into a position where I thought I'd fit perfectly, only to receive an email ten days later saying that I am no longer in consideration. In my mind, I had this whole thing planned out, and I've been thinking about it for some time, only to have someone who doesn't know me tell me that it's not going to happen. This has been the third time.
Maybe one day you will pour all you have into something you care about so much, and it will spill it all out on the floor. It's kind of like you spend so long preparing a nice cup of tea for someone, only for them to turn around and tell you that they do not like tea (and who doesn't like tea.. well, you get my point?)
If you didn't learn anything from a situation, chances are that situation will happen again at some point in your life. The funny thing is, I wasn't expecting to have to relive these heartbreaks so often and not in different aspects in my life. In my career, in my hobbies, in my relationships and in general - my future.
Fortunately, life does not come out with an exact blueprint on how each day, and each step are meant to be. We do not come with a manual. Our life is individual to ourselves, and we do not have to succumb to what others dictate. Not always, and this is where I slipped off to the next stage. Emptiness.
Emptiness
Then that initial sting turns into emptiness. You lose your focus, your drive. You have lost your purpose and maybe even your sense of awareness. When you lose these things, a void fills your heart and your mind. It may be confusing, but it happens to everyone.
Be picky with who and what you invest your time in. Wasted time is worse than wasted money. Every moment you spend wishing for an alternate outcome, you lose the chance to enter into new opportunities, one that may be more fruitful than the original plan.
I've learned this ever since I was younger. When something happens that effects your current standing, something even better is waiting for you. I used to be very active in the sports back in my hometown. I've played multiple sports for many years, but my sports 'career' ended with two concussions in the same weekend. I was pulled from sports immediately. But something else swooped in and changed everything - theatre. I have never been so drawn to a hobby in my whole life, and to the point that I wished for it to be my career (and still have thoughts about it to this day). I have had so many new opportunities branch from that, from community theatre to new friendships, and even spreading my wings with writing.
Everything happens for a reason. That emptiness you feel will lessen overtime. You will still hold a spot for that void in your heart, but something bigger and better will come along and ease that pain. I still think about sports often, but I do not know where I would be now without theatre in my life.
Failures
Over time, the things that bring us from heartbreaks to emptiness can be seen as failures. I am here to question the word, 'failure'. My biggest fear is failing, or the feeling of failing myself or others. I strongly dislike disappointment. So this is my mental chatter that I face now, in a way to control that anxiety.
Everything we go through is what creates us. The good and the bad. We shouldn't try to stop everything from happening. Sometimes we are meant to feel awkward, or vulnerable. Sometimes it's necessary because it's all part of getting to the next part of yourself. Who knows, that next part may be your best self.
After all, it is better to do something that others criticize than to do nothing and criticize others, and you cannot change what you refuse to confront. If I didn't try the things that I have this past year or two, I wouldn't have had these new changes happen that have blest me with new growth and new appreciation for different things. I have a whole new view on what is out there for me.
Just consider this. Consider becoming the type of energy that no matter where you go, or where you are, you always add value to the spaces and lives of those around you. So every attempt that you try, continues to add more value, maybe even more knowledge for yourself and for others. It is all a learning curve, all a new environment. Test the waters.
Remember, Things take time, and if you don't have the patience to let things slow cook and form then expect a life continually unfulfilled. We can't have high expectations and low patience.
If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives.
I suppose that I worry that each opportunity runs on time. Time is typically the most important variable in the equation of life. How much time to do I have? Will there be enough time? When?
Life is short, too short. Yes, that is the time variable speaking. But in the life we do have, we have an infinite amount of opportunities that await us. We only need to take the first step at opening the doors.
Yes, I have been good about opening those doors. Yes, I take rejection hard. No, I will not stop opening the doors. I do not want to waste the life I have. Even if I am rejected a dozen more times, more discoveries will unfold and more chances at new beginnings will be had. I learn and adapt. I become a better me.
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