Do you ever notice when you have a great idea, or think of something a bit daring, these voices come into your head to tell you why it is not a great idea. Maybe those voices include an overprotective family member, or some "realistic" friends, or just a representation of society in general. Or even worse, the voice is yours.
Now we have this invisible audience to justify ourselves to, even before we do anything, and it slows us down, if not completely blocks us from trying to create the life we want. Often when I meet people who are actually criticizing me, their not telling my story, they're telling their own. They need to make excuses for why they couldn't do what they wanted, and dismiss anything I've done for myself.
I no longer view these people as detractors, or enemies. I view them with compassion, and see it tragic that they haven't been able to break free from the invisible handcuffs they're wearing, and instead of devoting energy to build themselves up, they choose to tear others down. Even though I've been eliminating most of these types of people from my lives, they still exist in my head, and I have to be very careful not to give their words any value as I continue to take risks and explore life outside my comfort zone. I suggest you try the same.
In doing so, you promote change. The topic of change can be quite daunting. The idea of becoming someone new, trying new things, stepping out of your field of view can be overwhelming for most. It was for me, and it continues to challenge me on a daily basis. But, that is what I like; a challenge. The thrill, adrenaline of the challenge acts as motivation. Motivation, passion and desire for more sparks change to avoid stagnation. Breaking the cycle can be good, and should be celebrated, because the ship that you are waiting for to sail may be the very ship that you need to build for yourself. It is like wasting time doting on what you cannot change.
Your change, your attempt to change, should be celebrated. Do not let anyone make you feel guilty for the changes you are trying to make to improve your life.
There is no template to life. All we have is now. Living to uphold the expectations of others just means you'll have a list of people to blame when life still doesn't feel fulfilled. Take control of your life, and live the best life you can. Let that example inspire those around you.
This hasn’t been the easiest of posts for me to write. I’m pretty sure I’ve deleted more words than I’ve written and I’m still not sure if what I’m trying to actually say makes any lick of sense either but if you’ve been in my shoes, hopefully you’ll understand. As a person who has lost many family and friends, I should be a natural at this. I’ve been preparing myself for the emotional rollercoaster, I read blogs on grieving, books, gravitate toward my 'safe places' such as Disney, Harry Potter, Star Wars and of course, writing. Losing someone you care about isn't easy. But I didn’t expect it to be this hard either. I’m glad that at this point in time, society has been speaking more openly about mental health. I’m thankful that there are resources available for them when they need the help. I’m grateful for the awareness that is out there now amongst peers and teachers and others in authority. I can’t say enough how thankful I am to those who are...
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